Allyship & Compassion
God put me on this earth to…
advocate through allyship and compassion to usher in a renewal of justice-centered teaching.
One of the first classes I took, after acknowledging God’s call into ministry, was FMC History and Polity. If I was going to seek ordination in this denomination I wanted to know what was at its heart. As I learned about B.T. Roberts and the reasons he established the FMC my heart warmed. Freedom in worship, recognition of women in ministry, an outspoken stance against slavery, and the right for all people to be treated as equals when they walked through the doors of an FMC - these things all resonated deeply within me. What I learned about the history of the FMC sat “well with my heart”. So I moved forward to become licensed and start my journey towards ordination.
As I neared the finish line, I started to evaluate my experiences thus far in the FMC. Though there was an expressed interest in increased inclusion and diversity, in my lengthy experience as a Free Methodist, I had never seen or heard a POC as Lead Pastor. When I felt the nudge to start my own steps, I had doubts if I was hearing right, because I had never seen a woman lead in ministry outside of children’s, women’s, or worship ministry. I had never even heard a woman preach outside of the Women of Faith conferences our women’s group attended yearly. As I pushed forward I experienced more and more push back. I was befuddled and discouraged. I had been told I was wanted but, my actual experiences said otherwise. And we know what they say about actions and words. I really began to question whether I should stay or if it was time to discern a new path.
Then I came across Embrace All. A conference put together by FMC members across the nation with an emphasis on social justice. Sounded promising AND it filled one of my final educational requirements (BONUS!!). So I went. All the stuff that had been swirling around creating doubt and discouragement bubbled up to the surface. I began to realize that much of the pushback I had experienced had little to do with who I am as Marissa Mattox Heffernan, and heavily to do with who I am as a WOC. Thoughts I had been having but suppressed because it didn’t seem acceptable to say them were being spoken out loud as truth! I found the tribe I didn’t know was missing. All of us asking the same question: If social justice was part of the FMC DNA….where did it go? BRING IT BACK.
It seems that justice-centered DNA had evolved into a recessive trait. That DNA that provided the backbone of this faith tradition had been watered down by a more superficial generic brand of Christianity.
The traits of the FM tradition, its history, and its principles, are too good to be lost! Unfortunately, the issues that brought B.T. and his supporters to stand up and split from the Methodist Episcopal Church haven’t changed much. Racism, sexism, classism are still alive and well in our country and in our churches. But, we’ve grown silent. And we’ve grown comfortable in the silence and the privilege.
Change starts at home, right where we are. I have been part of this denomination for over 15 years. I am invested, in our history, our future, and in relationships; relationships which are the foundation for influence. Relationships built on the love, that inspires compassion. Compassion and relationship being necessities for allyship. I have found my voice and I can no longer be complicit in the silence. I want to see my brothers and sisters do better. We MUST do better
I am invested because here’s the thing...
I don’t believe this DNA is meant to be distinctive of this denomination alone. This DNA pulsed through the veins of Jesus Christ himself. It was in every cell of His being. And it has laid dormant in many of ours. At the very beginning, of the Gospel that as Christians we all proclaim, are humans made in the image of GOD. The marginalization of people that the Church has contributed to is the antithesis of who Jesus taught us to be.
God put me on this earth to advocate through allyship and compassion to usher in a renewal of justice-centered teaching.